If you ask someone if they believe in love at first sight, they just might look at you as if you asked them if they believe in ghosts or Santa Claus. Okay, maybe not Santa Claus. Some people will tell you, yes, they definitely believe in ghosts because they have seen or experienced them. Does that make them any more real to the rest of us? Similarly, some people will tell you they definitely believe in love at first sight because they’ve experienced it. Again I ask whether that makes it any more real to the rest of us.
Plato says that, according to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and a head with two faces. They angered the gods by striving to be like them. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives wandering to the ends of the Earth in search of their other halves. He goes on to say that, when one meets their other half, “The pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy, and one will not be out of the other’s sight, as I may say, even for a moment.” Aristophanes says, “This feeling is like a riddle and cannot be explained.”
From a Jewish point of view, their book of Genesis Rabba says, “Forty days before a child is born, its mate is determined upon.” How deep is that? So it seems we all definitely have our other half floating around out there that we will instantly recognize, we just have to find it.
When a friend and I took an informal survey of our Facebook friends, we got very opposite responses. About ninety-seven percent of my responses said, yes, they do believe in love at first sight. About ninety-seven percent of her responses said, no, they did not believe in love at first sight Maybe the people of the Midwest just believe in love at first sight, and the people of the west don’t. Maybe birds of a feather do indeed flock together. I just find it fascinating that so many of my friends believe in it unequivocally and so many of her friends unequivocally don’t. Doesn’t that seem odd?
It’s occurred to me that maybe people don’t believe in it because they haven’t yet met their other half. An even scarier thought is what if they never find their other half? What if they wander the Earth and search and search and search their whole life and never find their other half? Or, just as scary, what if they’ve become too cynical to recognize their other half when they meet them? What if they stop to tie their shoelace and round a corner just as the soul mate they would have met if they didn’t stop to tie their shoelace is hit by a bus? Is that possible? Would Fate be so cruel?
A lot of people respond to my question by saying they believe in lust at first sight and that love is something that is built over time. However, one of my friends once told me she never thought she would get married until she met her husband mid life, and she just knew. It was love at first sight. Maybe some people grow up next door to their soul mate, and it’s easy to find them. Maybe some people have to search the world over to find their other half.
I will describe myself as one of the most jaded people you will ever meet; however, when asked if I believe in love at first sight, I’d say, “Abso-bleepin’-lutely!” I can say that because I’m one of the apparently few people who have been lucky enough to experience love at first sight. In the movie The Wedding Crashers, Owen Wilson calls it your soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another. I feel that’s a perfect description.
If you haven’t been lucky enough to find and instantly recognize at first sight your soul mate, other half, or soul’s counterpart in another, Theosophy says, “When all karmic debt is purged, the two will fuse back together and return to the ultimate.” Edgar Cayce says, “We are attracted to another person at a soul level not because that person is our unique complement but because, by being with that individual, we are somehow provided with an impetus to become whole ourselves.” On The-soulmate-site.com they say, “Find out everything you can about what your soul wants of you. Why? Because that’s where your soul mate lives.” Plato loosely says, if we just kick back and do our thing, our paths will cross with our soul mates. I think that’s like saying it will come to us when we’re not looking for it. As someone who is not loosey-goosey and goes out and works her hardest for everything she wants, I find that last concept a little tough to grasp. Aristophanes says, “If man works with the god of Love, they will escape this fate and instead find wholeness.”
Whatever the means to find and instantly recognize your soul mate, I wish that everyone could experience it. Maybe that will be my Easter wish this year, to have all halves reunited. Oh, wait, that’s a birthday wish. Well, you all have a few months to go before I get to make that wish. Happy Easter and happy dating!
If you haven’t checked out my romance novel, Nine Days In Greece, and its sequel, Risking The Nine Days, here are the links: